Salam Ramadhan 1430H

Ramadhann is here again. I like Ramadhan because I don't have to think what to eat for breakfast, and lunch. The only think is what to cook for iftar and sahur. I like the tarawikh also because it is a once a year affair. This year I try to start from the first day. So far for the last 3 days I am good. Haven't skip it yet. InsyaAllah, I am trying to do it as much as I could.

There are only 4 of us in the house who are fasting. Hubby, me, Ayin and Syia. My mak doesn't fast this year. She is getting quite weak now. Hardly walk or move anywhere now. She spends most of her time in bed. She even eat in the bedroom. The only place she walks to is the bathroom which is only 3 or 4 steps away.

I think she is on her way to become senile (nyanyok). Although she recognises people but many things escape her memories. Solat time is always out. We need to tell her what prayer she is performing and how many rakaat that is. You tell her just 2 minutes away, and she will be asking you again what is she performing. She also need to be bathed as well. It is like going back to become a child once again. For now, I don't have to feed her but I wonder if she will need to be fed later on.

When she is like this, I can see the attitude of my siblings. Who really care for her and who doesn't. Who comes and visit who hardly ask about her. Even those who come and visit may not even spend time to talk to her, just making sure that they show their face. The only regular one is my younger sister. She is here almost every week.

With the ramadhan already starting, I am also thinking of the Aidilfitri. This year is another year which I can't contribute financialy towards the expenses for the aidilfitri. It is a big burden on my husband because the relatives who comes to our house every year is mine. Hardly anyone from his side comes, so he is spending on my behalf. I don't know how long it's going to be anyway.

To all my Muslim friends out there
Salam Ramadhan, may this Ramadhan be the best for all of us.

AN