December 30, 2005

A New Year 2006. A New Beginning?

Wow, it does feel that times passes very fast. 2005 is nearly over, a new year is beginning soon. Cepat sangat rasanya, dah 20 tahun aku bergelar sebagai isteri. Dah 18 tahun sebagai ibu. MasyaAllah. Apa agaknya accomplishment aku selama ni kan? Rasa macam tak ada apa-apa pun. Umur pun makin meningkat, ibadah macam mana? Dah ke bersedia nak menghadapi hari-hari tua? Tak lama lagi nak pencen dah kan, anak-anak belum lepas lagi. Tahun 2006 ni Angah nak ambik SPM, Syia UPSR. Bersedia kah depa tu? Macam mana nak bimbing depa untuk menghadapi tahun ni. Semalam pun hubby dah kata kena buat timetable bagi diorang tu. Aku kena tengok dulu timetable sekolah dan tuisyen diorang dulu tu.

Aku tak pernah buat azam tahun baru. Sebab pada aku, kalau berazam pun tak buat apa guna, nanti rasa guilty pulak, depress pulak sebab tak accomplish apa yang di azamkan tu. But then again plan kena buat. Tambah-tambah sekarang ni. Soal kerja tak berapa menentu, jadi nak kena jugak ada sedikit perancangan dalam kepala, apa nak buat kalau jadi macam ni, dan apa nak buat kalau jadi macam tu. Kena cari options yang boleh di buat kalau jadi sesuatu pada aku nanti. Uncertainties are better handled with plans. Plans do not mean we have to have a black and white on paper. Sebab yang ni bukan masalah negara yang kita nak plan ni. Just a small family "business" plan. Things that would involved money and time and at the end of day the result is one happy family without any hiccup. Come rain, shine, snow whatever senang je nak tangani tanpa banyak kerenah.

Apa lah aku membebel macam konsultant pulak ni, hehehe.

Apa-apa pun, sekolah pun dah nak bukak. Persediaan persekolahan anak-anak dah pun ada. Aku beli tambah je, yang mana anak-anak kata perlu beli. Beg sekolah beli baru, baju jadikan 3 pasang sebab bibik dah tak ada, senang kalau hari hujan tak sempat kering ke apa. Kasut masih elok lagi jadi tak payah beli. Buku banyak yang re-cylcle so tambah yang tak ada je tu. Jadi tak berapa banyak yang kena beli pun. Tak lah terasa sangat tahun ni. Cuma nanti bila bukak sekolah, aku makin sibuk, sebab pagi sebelum pergi kerja kena masak nasi dan lauk untuk diorang balik nanti. Nak kena siapkan sarapan mak jugak, sebab anak2 semua dah ke sekolah. Kerja rumah lain kena siapkan samada pada malam atau pagi-pagi jugak lah. Jadinya makin kuranglah masa tidur nanti. Mungkin boleh kurus sikit kut ni hehehe.

Apa-apapun, kat sini aku nak ambil kesempatan nak ucapkan

Selamat Menyambut Tahun Baru 2006.
Semoga 2006 membawa lebih kesejahteraan kepada kita semua. InsyaAllah.

December 28, 2005

20th Wedding Annivessary

Today 28th December 2005, is our (hubby and I) 20th wedding annivessary. I am not able to write anything yet as I am in KL office for the day for a very important meeting. Will write ASAP.

We came out from the house at 4.30 am this morning, to drive to KL office for my meeting as well as to send Kak Long back to campus. The rush was to make sure we arrived before 9.00 am which is the time for Kak Long’s first class today. I intentionally asked hubby to accompany me to KL for this trip because of the annivessary. Saja-saja nak berdua-duan dengan dia tu. Since Kak Long went home for the Christmas holiday and knowing that we were coming to KL then she stayed on until today.

After we sent her to campus, on the way to my KL Office I just casually ask hubby.

Me : " Do you remember that today is our anniversary? "

Hubby : (Much to my surprised). " Ingat, tapi hari ni berapa haribulan, 28 kan? Bukan semalam ka? "

Me : " La, hari ni lah. "

Hubby : " Yang ke berapa dah? "

Me : " 20 dah"

See, that is my hubby, he forgets all the important dates in our lives. The only date he remembers is his own birthday, :-), which he will remind me a few days before. Every year when he has to fill in the income tax form, he will call me to ask for the girls birthdates. I will always asked him back, whether he remembers mine. He said he did, but on the actual day he "forgets".

That is typical of him, I have long given up the sulking or merajuk for all these. So how do you expect him to surprise me with something romantic for to tonight? I will be really, REALLY surprise if he does. The presents that he will buy me would be items of clothing. The first and the probably the last time he bought me flowers was the day I gave birth to Kak Long.

Don’t get me wrong, I love him very much. Because as a husband, he is a good husband. As an individual he is a nice person. Being a perfectionist, he keeps me in line with my a lot of things. My cloth’s sense and style, the way I walk and talk etc. Leaving things to me I will sure be very "selekeh" He is my biggest critics in a lot of things. But at the same time he encourages me in things that he knows I am good at. In our relationship we are GOOD friends as well as we are lovers.

My parents’ marriage was not a very good one. I told my husband that I would not want our marriage to be like theirs. And I will continue working after we were married. Because my parents will expect it of me after they had paid for my education. On his side of the family, the week of our wedding, the family was shocked of the news of the brother-in-law’s lies to his eldest sister (Kak Maz). The late BIL had been having a second wife for 10 years before Kak Maz discovered she had a madu. So the lie had hurt the whole family badly, but it was a blessing in disguise for me.

The first year of marriage for me was a trial one, I had known hubby for 8 years before we got the married. I was of the idea that my money is mine, but his money is for sharing. But in the end I come to term that we have to share what we earn for the sake of the family. In marriage for me, it is more than just sex, it is a lot more. It is a relationship, a lot of giving and taking on both sides. It is a commitment by both parties to make the marriage work. Once both had given that commitment ang continue to stick to that commitment then the marriage works. Love can evaporates like any other emotions, there are times that we were happy and there are times that hates each others’ guts but at the end of the day we are still committed to the solemn lafaz nikah. We are not a perfect couple, but on the whole I would say, Alhamdullilah, so far Allah has blessed me with a good marriage. I hope it will last until we both passed on to the next world.

December 25, 2005

The Family Law

When I signed in to YM on Friday night, the 2 makciks were almost instantaneously buzz me. It was a long day for me, and I had just finished my housework for the night after my mak had her meal. She eats late as she wanted to finish he Isyak prayers with all the sunat prayers and what not.

When Kak Teh asked me "N, what do you think of the Family Law?" I was really "blur". This is the worst case or "blurness", I am even ashamed of writing down what my answer to her here. I was totally and shamefully ignorant of the MOST important issue for us women in Malaysia. MakAndeh said observantly, "Ni sah dah tak baca paper ni?" I did admit that I had not seen the paper for the day, online or offline. I did not have the luxury of the time to even listen to the Prime Time news on TV these days. So my past time of blogging in between solat Maghrib and Insyak (in my telekung) is now something of the past.

I am not going to elaborate on the new law that had been passed in the Parliament recently. Kak Teh and MakAndeh have done that already. So please go and read their blogs, if you haven't already. They have said enough and clearly too.

Can you imagine, if someone like me, who have got all the facilities, TV, newspapers, internet, could have missed it, what would be the implication to the women who are not as priviledged as I am? Those who day in day out slog hard to share the burden of the family livelihood. Do they have to find out the hard way, about the implication of the new law when and only when they go to syariah court to fight for their rights and their children rights. Only to be told that their polygamous husband has the right to their hard earn money or properties?

If you do not want to think about yourselves, then think about the ordinary Kak Lijah, Mak Timah, Tok Semah etc, etc, How would they survive if their piece of land on which their house is build is now being divided into 2 for the husband to have a second wife. I hope we have made this clear already.

December 23, 2005

The Cat is Out Of the Bag

I have read Arena's entry about her indecision, whether to let her husband know about her blog. I didn't leave a comment there, but I know how she feels, on which step to take. If she doesn't tell him, what if he finds out that she has a blog, will he feel left out and hurt? What if she decides to let him know, will he be her biggest critic that may end up in her feeling uneasy to blog after that? I can't influence Arena or any other blogger for that decision because I my self have not told my hubby the url of my blog.

Let me digress a bit.

I don't tell the existance of this blog to any one of my colleagues. Not even PS who has been my closest friend and colleague. To those who have been following this blog should know that PS is the one who travel with me on my business trips to KL. In fact she has met Makandeh, AuntieYan, Wynn and a former male blogger. She knows I use the nick AuntyN, I used to tell her about those blogs I have visited, talked about funny stuff people write in their blogs etc. But I didn't tell her that I have a blog and the blog url.

One day out of my own carelessness, I used her PC to check something on the net. I was having connection problem with my office laptop, I wanted to be sure that, whether it was my laptop or for some reason I was blocked from surfing the net. (Don't get any ideas, hehehehe , if I want to surf the "forbidden" sites I might just do it at home, why smear my reputation at work right?) So in the end I sent my laptop to the IT dept for re-configuration. While I was at PS' PC I just could not tear myself away from looking into my blog. At the end of it, I was so careless as not to delete the history. Well, there you go, it was like, me asking PS to indirectly read my blog right? She saw it and quickly asked another colleague to go into the blogspot.

Later, PS came to tell me that she had "found" my blog and informed the other lady. I had her promise not to tell anymore colleague on the existence of my blog. She said she wouldn't and yes, she can be trusted. The other lady, whom PS had informed told her that, by reading my blog she now feels up close and personal with my everyday life, She feels that she knows me better, not just as a superior at work. In her word she said that, she feels closer to me. I am glad of that.

That was like months ago. Recently, again I was exposed. Another colleague (this time in the KL office) discovered my blog. AMZA has been blog hopping for some time. She has read my blog before, some of her friends read it too. She said she suspected it for some time already that it could be me, but she wasn't sure. But one of my entries, I think it was the entry which I was describing my activities in KL office that confirmed it. When she revealed that she knows the url, I told her to keep it as a secret from the other colleagues as well. I trust she is keeping the secret because so far no other person in this company has revealed to me that they have found my blog. Takut aku boss aku baca blog ni, karang kena pulak tutup blog tak semena-mena kan. Not that I have been writing about work or work related issues that much any way.

As for my other half, as most people called thier hubby. He was always asking what I was doing in front of the PC for a long time almost every nite. My answer, would always be "tak ada apa-apa". He knows that I am chatting with friends and Kak Long, he knows that I surf the net. I cannot say that he disapproved because, when I have problems with the network like the other day with the network card he would be the one who would take the trouble to bring the PC to the shop. Although he thinks that I am wasting a lot of my time being on the net, he cannot change my mind or habit. So, in my defence (konon ni lah nak kata, aku tak buang masa kat internet tu) I told him that I am writing on the net as a blogger like his nephew Javard. The only thing is I am still hiding the url from him. So far I am still lucky because he doesn't have the inclination to surf the internet. Kena dok pedo-pedo (kata orang utara, pedo= thread carefully) ni, so that he will be like that for a long time. Mana lah tahu terkenan dengan blogging pulak tu. For sure kena hi-jack PC setiap malam sebab sama-sama nak update blog, heheh. Ohh TIDAKKKKKK.

I am not telling NOT because I do NOT want to share this part of my life with him, but there are other reasons why. One of them of course, is the fact that I could no longer whine about him, hehehe, when I need to do that. Tak boleh nak mengumpat dah kan hehe, sebab nanti makin teruk dia merajuk, atau kena censor lah pulak. Lagi teruk nanti kut kena tutup terus sebab dia kata dia malu. So far he is OK with it, not knowing what I have written, I think he is just giving me the space to let off my angst once in a while.

In some cases I would say that the spouse should be told, you have to decide on that, because you would know your spouse better. As for me, I am not telling him just yet, maybe one day, I will show him an entry, so that if ever I were to be gone from this world before him he can try to rekindle the memories of our lives together thru the blog.

I am going to have a very BUSY week-end, so Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all.

December 21, 2005

Saying Our Goodbyes

Today is bibik's flight home to Indonesia, This week activities in my household were also centered around her. Last Saturday, I took her shopping, she wanted to buy some stuff to bring home. T-shirts for her sons, tudungs for her grandmother and mother. Yes, she said she still have a grandmother (Bibik is 50 years old!!!). I changed some money into Indon rupiah for her and so on.

Sunday, I sent her to her former employer Puan J, bibik wanted to stay overnite for the last time there. Puan J ni pun dah nampak successful, She and the husband just received a Mercedes Benz 200 Kompressor just from doing the Gano business. They have been doing it all out for the last 7 years. It just prooved that with hard work, you can always be successful.

Monday, I had to get her passport and the letter from the Immigration to allow her to go home. Later I had to fetch her from Puan J's. Tuesday, I remitted the balance of her salary money to the person she always sent the money to. I am worried for the safety of the money when she arrived in Jogjakarta. But she said that, the bank charges there are very high. Macam lintah darat pulak no. And lastly today, Wednesday, we said out goodbyes to bibik. She has been a loyal maid and part of our family for a long time. It is very likely that she may not be coming back here again. Her age and a few other factors will make it difficult for her to come back to Malaysia to work.

Bibik's flight was at 9.05 am from Penang, to KLIA. Then, she will board another flight to Jogjakarta at 12.00 noon. We left home at 7.00 am to try to make it on time for the flight. All of us, even my mak went to send her off. I was confident that we would made it on time, but the traffic was busy during that time, people were going to work, and there was an unusual jam on the bridge. We dicovered later that 4 cars were involved in an accident. They kissed each others butt obviously in the haste to get to the other end. We did arrive with just enough time to check in the luggages. pay for the overweight baggage and get her the boarding pass. She had to get another boarding pass to Jogjakarta in KLIA because the next flight would be Garuda Air. Just had time to salam, hugs and off she went to board the flight. We all pray that she will have a safe flight home.

Back home, we bought breakfast and some lauk. That would only mean that I would not need to cook lunch anymore. But need to do some training and re-arranging of house work. Syia, being the youngest, has always been the pampered one. Being the one who bibik took care of since her very first day, need to be trained to do simple house work. We started with how to cook rice. She measured the rice, the water and place them into the rice cooker. Then there is another pot for maktok. (Maktok eats brown rice at the advice of the doctor). Then the feeding of the cats and chicken in the reban. She even put clothes into the washing machine to be washed.

We discussed about the daily help when they started school, Ayin said, we need to have someone be at home until she gets home from school, latest she said by 3.00 pm. The rest, we will try to manage between ourselves. They know that they will have to take part in helping us around the house. We willl manage somehow.

Now, the difficult part is to leave the house unattended or when I need to bring the girls out shopping for school stuffs. Or when the girls want to go out to have some fun. Someone amongst us need to sacrifice the time.

It was difficult for bibik to say goodbye to us and like wise for us to her. I called Kak Long to let bibik talked to her on the phone and she was already tearful. Bibik wrote us a note, saying thank you and to ask for forgiveness. It was difficult for her to express that face to face.

We all are thankful to bibik, May Allah Bless her and will always protect her and give her abundance rezeki in her homeland. We do not know whether we will be meeting her again. We hope InsyaAllah we will one fine day.

December 18, 2005

Derma Darah & Pingat Emas

Hoki team wanita Pulau Pinang dapat pingat emas dalam Sukan Wanita di Bukit Jalil baru-baru ni. Angah is part of the team. Tahniah untuk mereka.

Khamis lepas, semasa aku bercanda dengan internet ni, Kak Long anak dara aku tu buat miss call.Diorang ni biasa dah macam tu, sebab nak save kredit diorang tu. Aku call lah balik, kejap je cakap tu sebab dia tanya pasal duit yuran hostel. Tup, tup aku terlupa nak sampaikan salam orang kat dia. Aku sms dia kata si folan ni kirim salam kat dia.

Kak Long : " Hah, apasal tetiba kirim salam ni? "

Aku : " Tak de lah tadi mama cakap mama nak call, tanya lerr kut sapa2 nak kirim salam. :-) "

Kak Long :" Owh, OK w'kumsalam. Kak Long tengah makan. Jap g nakpi derma darah. Boleh kan? "

She asked permission for places she wants to go and things she wants to do. Baik kan anak aku ni hehehehe (Siap promote lagi tu, sabar je lah kan?)

Aku : " OK ".

Later, another missed called.

I called her back.

Aku : " Awat pulak? "

Kak Long : " Tak leh derma, orang tu kata darah tak cukup haemoglobin"

Aku : " La, badan besar macam tu pun tak cukup darah? " (Gurau dengan dia)

Kak Long : Dia gelak " Itu lah Kak Long cakap camtu tadi, tapi dia kata darah cair "

She sounded disappointed.

Aku : " Tanya tak nak buat macam mana nak bagi naik tu? "

Kak Long : " Dia suruh makan hati, limpa, badam cam gitu lah. Dulu tu tak cukup umur, la ni dah tak cukup haemoglobin pulak"

Aku : " Tak pa lah, next time. Nanti beli badam makan banyak-banyak. Tak tanya ka bila depa nak mai balik? "

Kak Long : " Dah tanya tadi "

She sounded very dissapointed. Memang berkobar-kobar dia ni nak derma darah. Masa mula masuk dulu tu dia belum lagi 18 tahun. Jadi diorang kata kat dia dia belum cukup umur nak menderma. Ni dah kena reject sekali lagi. Aku ni pulak terasa kedekut sebab tak pulak pernah terasa nak derma darah.

Ni nak tanya lah sikit sesapa yang pandai dalam hal ni, Dr Rosa ke? OK ke Kak Long tu. Blood group dia O. Lupa nak tanya rH + atau -ve. Tapi perlukah aku membawa dia pergi check-up ke apa ke? Dia memang nampak sihat, cergas jugaklah. Should I bring her for a check-up or anything?

December 16, 2005

Jaga Tepi Kain

Masa singgah hantar Kak Long di Cyberjaya lepas balik dari Trengganu hari tu, aku ada mintak dari Kak Long se helai skirt panjang. Skirt ni sebenarnya ada dalam list barang-barang yang perlu di bawa semasa mula-mula Kak Long memasukki MMU, masa orientasi tu. Tapi bila aku tanya dia kata sampai hari ni pun dia tak pernah pakai dan kalau aku nak dia kata ambik lah. Aku pun kata suruh dia bagi kat aku. Skirt baru, tak pernah pakai boleh tambah satu lagi item dalam almari aku. Memang aku pun dah fed-up dok asyik pakai baju yang sama je, nak lah jugak pakai something new. Lagipun adik aku S kan dah bagi blouse memang elok di padankan dengan skirt hitam tu.

Hari pertama aku pakai datang ofis, masa duduk kat kerusi, terasa ada benang terlekat kat kaki. Makin aku tarik, makin panjang jadinya. Bila dah habis semua baru aku perasan yang benang tu adalah penjahit kaki skirt tu. Terburai rupanya. Adoi, selekeh jadinya berjalan dengan hem yang terjulur tu. Kat ofis memang aku ada simpan sewing kit yang selalu kita jumpa kat hotel-hotel tu. Benda kegemaran yang akan aku sapu kalau ada dibekalkan di hotel. Jadi apa lagi aku pun silakan kaki naik atas kerusi, sambil dok jahit kaki kain, sambil lah sekali sekala jari mengetuk keyboard. Konon-konon dok buat kerja lah tu. Mata pun liar memandang ke luar ofis takut ada yang datang nak jumpa aku. Kut tak sedar karang ternampak pulak aurat aku yang tak patut nampak tu kat :-), :-). Nasib baik meja aku bukan yang jenis terbuka kat depan, tak lah orang nampak kalau aku duduk bersila kat atas kerusi aku ni. Memang itulah cara aku duduk selalu pun. Bukak kasut angkat kaki bersila atas kerusi. Posisi yang paling comfortable.

On a subtle note, tepi kain atau tepi kaki seluar ni kena jaga selalu. Mana lah tau kut kut terpalit tahi ayam ke, tahi kucing ke. (Eleh, kalau duduk bandar sure tak de itu semua kan? Duduk kampung macam aku ni je yang jadi tu semua, betul tak?). Namun macam tu kadang-kadang kita ni agak keterlaluan menjaga tepi kain. Kalau jaga tepi kain sendiri tak apa lah juga, ni dok sibuk jaga tepi kain orang sampai kadang-kadang sampai tahap mengutuk, mencela, menghina dan mengaibkan orang lain tu. Tiba-tiba pandang kat tepikain kita terbau tahi pulak. Kan ke naya namanya tu.

Katalah, ada seorang yang kita kenal telah membuat suatu kesalahan. Memang lah benda tu salah, orang yang buat tu pun tahu dia buat salah, Malah rasanya dia pun menyesal dengan apa yang dia buat tu. Alih-alih, kita yang kenal atau tak berapa kenal, dia tanpa usul periksa asyik dok kepoh sana, kepoh sini, siasat sana siasat sini bercserita sana sini tentang keburukan dan kesalahan orang itu. Benda yang sulit pun dijaja sana sini. Apa kata kalau benda yang sama jadi pada kita. Mahukah kita, orang dok jaga tepi kain kita dan mula mengutuk kita macam tu?. Sanggup kah kita tengok orang-orang yang kita sayang (mak bapak, adik beradik, anak-anak) di kaitkan sama, di caci di cela?. Mereka ini mungkin just innocent bystanders. Yang lebih menyakitkan lagi adalah bila orang-orang yang dulunya kita anggap sebagai kawan, yang selalu kita tolong tu lah yang dok sakan sangat mengutuk kita. Tak ka sakit hati kita dibuatnya?. Itulah kata orang masa kita senang semua kawankita, masa kita susah masa tu lah kita tahu siapa kawan siapa lawan. Siapa jujur, siapa yang hanya mencari peluang. Kita bukan boleh tahu bila sesuatu musibah akan menimpa kita. InsyaAllah , kita di jauhkan dari segala yang buruk berlaku pada kita.

Menjaga tepi kain orang ni kalau nak diikutkan buka suatu yang negatif. Kalau kita tahu jiran kita kena dera ka tak kan kita masih nak ambil sikap tak mau jaga tepi kain dia kan? Kalau kita tahu kawan-kawan di timpa musibah, kita call atau sms dia tanya dia, dia OK ka, tunjuk kita support dia, nasihat dia, tanya dia apa kita boleh tolong, doakan dia, agar Allah permudahkan segala pekerjaan dia untuk mengeluarkan diri dia dari musibah tu. Kan ke elok tu? Itu baru kita boleh kata jaga tepi kain yang positif.

Adoi, susah betul lah aku ni. Susah nak buang tabiat kuat berleter ni. OK lah aku nak duduk diam diam dah lepas ni......

p/s Untuk seorang adik,

I know you are hurting
I know things seem to be ALL against you
I know your journey to happiness is long and full of thorns
There is still light at the end of the tunnel
There are still people who care
There are still people that need you to love them

My prayers are with you.

December 14, 2005

Menjaga Mak & Ayah

Bila baca entry Kak Teh tentang mak dia, tergenang air mata. Aku tahu perasaan Kak Teh, pasti terasa "helpless" kat sana terkenang mak yang tak sihat. Sama-sama kita panjatkan doa untuk kesihatan mak Kak Teh. InsyaAllah mak Kak Teh, sihat semula.

Teringat jugak entry Bergen perihal menjadi caregiver, terasa insaf dan banyak pulak yang terasa yang bukan senang nak menjaga orang tua. Memang betul, kata orang tua-tua, seorang mak boleh menjaga 10 anak, tapi kekadang seorang anak pun tak dapat nak jaga seorang emak.

Mak Kak Teh beruntung sebab dia punyai anak-anak yang perihatin yang teramat sayang pada dia. Rasanya semua anak-anak sayangkan emak/ayah mereka, tetapi cuma kasih sayang tu saja yang bagaimana caranya di tunjukkan kepada emak masing-masing tu yang berbeza. Kalau seorang emak/ayah secara lazimnya sanggup berkorban apa saja untuk anak-anak, namum kadang-kadang ada anak-anak yang tak sanggup meninggalkan tempat kerja yang lumayan untuk duduk dekat atau bersama mak/ayah. Ada juga yang pada mulut katanya sayang tapi, dalam setahun berapa kali menjenguk emak dan ayah. Kalau emak/ayah menalipun bertanyakan bila nak balik tengok mak/ayah, alasannya adalah sibuk. Kalau dulu mak sibuk nak menyusu dan membelai kita baru padan muka kita kan?

Memanglah ada jugak emak/ayah yang juga mementingkan diri sendiri, yang sanggup ikut boyfriend/girfriend lari atau yang tinggalkan anak-anak tepi longkang dan sebagai. tetapi pada lazimnya lah emak/ayah kasihkan anak-anak lebih dari anak-anak kasihkan mereka. Mungkin naluri yang Allah beri macam tu agaknya, kita pun yang ada anak-anak akan tahu yang kita pun selalunya lebihkan anak-anak dari emak/ayah sendiri. Kadang-kadang sebab kita ingat tak apalah ada adik beradik lain yang dok bela diorang. Jadi kita pun lepaskan tangan.

Dari pengalaman aku pun bukan senang nak bela orang tua. Terutama yang banyak cikadak dan kerenah tu. Boleh hilang sabar dibuatnya. Selama yang aku ingat, mak aku dulu kena bela/jaga nenek aku, emak mentuanya. Mak aku semasa dia menikah dengan ayah dia dah yatim piatu. Semasa hayat arwah nenek yang kami panggil "tok" tu memang cerewet. Sebelum dia meninggal pun dia dah nyanyuk, bila kita dah mandikan dia, dia masih dok kata dia belum mandi. Walaupun kami suruh dia pegang rambut yang masih belum kering tu, selepas 5 - 10 minit dia akan panggil kata nak mandi.Berkali2 dia mandi dalam satu hari, kain baju pun jadi banyak nak di basuh. Dah lah dia tak larat nak bangun sendiri, nak kena angkat dan pimpin dia jalan ke bilik air. Kalau tak ikut dia akan meraung sampai kami mandikan dia sekali lagi. Masa tu aku masih dok study kat USM jadi banyak jugaklah masa aku balik dok tolong mak, angkat tok, bagi mandi, cebokkan dia dan suapkan makanan kat dia. Air teh mesti selalu ada kat dalam bekas minum dia dan mesti panas sentiasa, kalau tak ada dia akan campak saja bekas tu. Namun aku tengok mak sabar melayan mentua dia.

Masa mak mentua aku sakit, hubby tak sampai hati tengok mak dia dalam keadaan yang kurang memuaskan di rumah adik dia. Cuma kami sempat jaga arwah MIL selama sebulan sahaja sebelum dia meninggal tu. MIL ni seorang yang terlalu baik. Mulutnya manis sampai ke akhir hayat, tak de nak marah-marah. Aku pun syukur jugak sebab masa arwah duduk rumah aku anak-anak tolong sikit-sikit jaga nani diorang. Masa tu bibik tak ada, Kak Long di tingkatan 2, angah darjah 6. Kak Long sekolah petang dia temankan nani sampai hubby balik, masa lunch untuk bersihkan MIL. Petang angah pulak tolong temankan, adik2 masih kecik tak berapa boleh di harap lagi, balik sekolah diorang (Ayin & Syia) duduk rumah mak dan ayah aku masa tu.

Dari umur Ayin 10 tahun, Ayin tinggal dengan mak dan ayah. Walaupun rumah kami dekat tapi bila mak dah tak berapa larat nak buat kerja rumah, sakit lutut dan sebagainya, aku pujuk Ayin suruh tinggal dengan mak. Malam-malam dia boleh tolong mak ambikkan air, masukkan baju dalam washing mesin dan sebagainya. Weekend, aku ambik dia balik rumah. Bila anak sedara aku mula duduk dengan mak baru aku benarkan Ayin tinggal balik dengan keluarga kami. Ayin pun manja jugak lah dengan mak dan ayah. Ayah selalu belikan apa yang dia mahu tu.

Tahun lepas masa ayah sakit2, sebelum meninggal tu, banyak jugaklah kerenah dia yang kami kena ikut. Ayah ni macam fobia bila nak masuk rumah, dia kata dia tak boleh tidor, perut dia berangin dan macam. Kalau dia nak makan tak mau makan kat rumah, kena kami almost setiap malam bawak dia makan kat luar. Dalam kereta dia tidor, sampai rumah dia mula mengelisah. Merata jugak kami berubat, ubat doktor, ubat kampung semua buat dah. Sampai satu tahap aku cakap dengan sorang doktor tu aku agak "it was all in his mind". Nak tergolek aku dan adik aku gelak bila doktor tu (pompuan pulak tu, cun lagi) cakap kat ayah aku "Pakcik ni ada girlfriend ke? Tidor tak lena, makan tak kenyang?" Doktor tu joke sajalah, dia bagi uabt jugak untuk tenangkan fikiran ayah.

Sekarang mak duduk dengan aku. Kerenah dia pun banyak. Aku selalu jugak cakap dengan adik beradik aku supaya jangan cakap kesusahan atau problem diorang dengan dia. Aku cuba tapis apa2 yang nak beritahu kat dia. Sebabnya nanti benda kecil jadi besar, benda yang mak tak sepatutnya risau, dia akan risau. Yang penting bagi aku dia tak risau apa-apa dan tumpukan pada kesihatan dia ibadah dia. Walau kadang-kadang aku rasa bersalah dan macam anak derhaka, aku harap aku dapat jaga dia dengan baik.

Anak-anak banyak membantu, diorang tahu kalau nak pergi mana pun dengan mak mesti ada sorang yang nak kena pimpin maktok. Jadi diorang taklah mengelak kalau di ajak. Namun kadang2 aku pun terkilan dengan anak2 adik-beradik aku jugak, diorang kalau suruh temankan mak kadang2 boleh cakap tak nak terus. Ada juga yang kadang-kadang mak terkilan sebab ada cucu yang susah nak menjenguk dia. Dulu MIL pun pernah terasa macam tu.

Aku buat semua ni pun bukan apa, aku ingat satu hari aku pun akan tua jugak. Anak-anak aku perempuan semua nya. Kalau aku umur panjang sampai nyanyok (nauzubillah) aku takut jugaklah nanti anak cucu meluat dengan aku. Aku harap aku bila tua nanti tak lah menyusahkan anak cucu.

Sapa-sapa yang ada mak/ayah tu hargailah diorang, sebab bila diorang dah pergi nanti, kita akan terasa kehilangan diorang tu. Masa tu dah terlambat dah.

December 12, 2005

S Stands for Shopping

Kak Yan's comment in my previous post triggered this entry.

My sister S is a shopoholic, I can say that to her. I don't know where she has the energy and the money to do that. The energy perhaps because she is focussing all her energy and thoughts away from her marrital problems, so the energy is being diverted to the shopping. Pretty expensive activities, don't you think. Money? She is a working lady. Having the right "kaki" I can tell you the rombongan pengantin had turned out into the rombongan shopping.

During the Trengganu trip, my sister S went with her youngest daughter, my abang ngah, kak ngah, my niece Ina (Abang Ngah's daughter) and their other niece. My younger brother S and his family (wife and 2 kids). Abang Long and wife, SIL (kak long's colleagues) as well as a cousin and his wife Kak Nas. The ladies turned out to be are all shopoholics.

They started the journey at about 8.30 am from Penang. My sister S, along the way kept calling me to either ask where we were or to tell where they were at that time. The first stop was Bukit Bunga (somewhere in Kelantan), the excuse was to ease themselves and while others have gone to the toilet, the others would shop. My reaction was, "What? you all are already shopping?" She laughed and said, "Not me, but the others lah". I saw Ina and her cousin was wearing Garfiels bedroon slippers in the hotel room which she said she bought for RM10 per pair.

Then there was a stop for makan, again it the bus stopped for over an hour because someone went shopping. Purggghh, lucky for me I didn't follow them. Otherwise I would be so bored waiting for them to come back to the bus.

The next day after the nikah ceremony was over, S was already feeling bored. She asked around if the others would like to adjourned to Pasar Payang. Lucky the others were in tune with her thoughts. However they had only about 1.5 hours of shopping time there. She came back to the hotel, complaining that there were not enough time for her to go round the whole of Pasar Payang!!!!. I met S and my other siblings as they came down from the bus in front of the hotel. I was going to get something to eat for the kids who were in the swimming pool. She asked me whether I and hubby would want to go to the Pasar that evening, if yes, she wanted to follow us to continue shopping. Told her hubby said that he wanted to go but he was sleeping and as far as I know, the pasar would be closed by 5.00 pm. At that time, it was already almost 5.00 pm. Much to her disappointment, we would not made it in time to go there that evening. But after dinner, we the adults, leaving the kids behind at the hotel went shopping for keropok lekor/losong, ikan kering etc aroung Rusila, Chendering area.

That night, my sis S and my abang ngah had already been planning the route back to Penang. They wanted to suggest that the travel back route would pass through Kota Baru. That way they can all stop at the Pasar Khadijah. At first Abang Long didn't agree but Kak Nas (another shopoholic lady), had told Abang Long similar plan. S was so happy to hear that.

So along they go home, stopping to shop at Kota Baru. When they boarded the bus again after the shopping spree, I received an SMS from S.

S : "Aku untung RM15 juai kain kat Kak Nas hehehe"

Me : " Oi sempat buat business lagi dalam bas tu no? Hehe. How come?"

S : "Aku beli kain Siam 5 pasang , dia tengok masa bas dah jalan, dia nak bagi anak dia tak cukup so mintak nak beli, Aku muck-up lah"

Me : "Pandai lah hang".

All in all she bought 5 pairs of materials (1 in Pasar Payang, 4 in Kota Bahru). At least 2 tudung, and some blouses and Tshirts for her children. Kak Lang bought some talam for the hantaran since her eldest daughter will be getting married next year. Kak Ngah also bought some talam, she said just for spares, 3 has 3 unmarried daughters. They bought some beras siam, I got 1 packet and I think the whole bus was full of things from the shopping spree. :-), :-) Whateverlah asal diorang ni happy kan..

As for me, didn't have much time for shopping. When we were having our second breakfast with Po, my abang lang was already calling me.

Abang Lang :" Hangpa kat mana ni?"

Me : " Nak pi makan nasi dagang sat"

Abang Lang : " hah!! Nak pi makan lagi?"

Me : " Ada orang nak belanja ni"

Abang Lang : " OK"

Half hour later,

Abang Lang : " Hoi, hang pa tak habih makan lagiiiii?"

Me : "Dah habih dah, dok balik hotel ni nak check-out"

Abang Lang : " La tak check-out lagi?"

Me : " Dak lagi, hehehe. Awat tak larat nak shopping dah ka? " Sambil gelak.

Abang Lang : " Ha lah, lagi lama lagi banyak duit aku habih ni"

In the end we made it there and do a bit of shopping before we travelled home.

I am not much of a shopper really, usually I will go shopping when necessary.

Anyone has got an interesting shopping spree lately?

December 08, 2005

Rombongang Penganting...

Ni update yang paling senang sebab pictures speak a thousand words.

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Tu hah, satu bas rombongan "Cik Kiah" membawa pengantin ke Trengganu tu.

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Bapa pengantin perempuan : "Aku nikahkan dikau Ahmad...... dengan anakandaku F dengan emas kahwinnya RM90 tunai..."
Pengantin lelaki : "Aku terima nikahnya........"
Imam (sambil memenadang saksi) : "Soh doh kerr?"
Saksi : "Sekali lagi, dok molek lagi dengor tuh"

Sian pengantin hehehe, sabar je lah, nasib baik 2 kali je tu

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Hantaran dari pihak lelaki, ber temakan hijau.

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Balasan dari pengantin perempuan.

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Singahsana raja2 sehari

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Seorang isteri baru mencium tangan suami

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Balasan ciuman di dahi isteri

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Intai gape tu wei ? hehehe

Yang last ni selingan je ni......

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Milik siapakah lesung pipit, senyuman manis ini?.................................

December 06, 2005

Trengganu Le Ni...

Alhamdulillah, selama kami di Trengganu, tak hujan pun. Masa dalam perjalanan hujan sikit di Pahang. Terang benderang dari hari mula sampai kami balik. Jadi semua kerja berjalan dengan lancarnya.

Mula tu, ikut plan asal, kami sepatutnya bertolak ke KL pada Khamis pagi. Tapi hubby ada hal penting hari khamis, katanya dia akan balik 1/2 day, lepas lunch. Aku tunggu sampai tertidur, petang baru dia balik. Dah tu angah yang sepatutnya sampai pukul 5.00 ptg dari Seremban, sampainya pukul 8.00 malam. Hubby tak sampai hati nak tinggalkan dia jadi pergi ambik dia dulu, dapatkan kepastian yang Angah betul-betul tak nak ke Trengganu bersama kami. Dah tu dia hampir terlupa buah pala yang dia janji untuk kawan di Trengganu tu.

In the end, kami bertolak dari rumah pukul 4.00 pagi selepas dapat tidur 2 - 3 jam. Sampai Cyberjaya 8.30 pagi ambik Kak Long terus ke Shah Alam, berenti breakfast kejap, lepas tu terus ke rumah Abang Lang yang telah sedia menanti. Kami bertolak dari Shah Alam menuju ke Trengganu pada hampir 11.00 pagi. Jadinya, pertukaran driver pun berlaku agak kerap sebab mengantuk. Sampai Trengganu, di Batu Buruk Beach resort pun dah hampir maghrib. Biasalah bila dah convoy, sat orang ni nak kencing, sat lapar, sat ngantuk, banyak tempat yang berhenti pun.

Perjalanan dari Shah Alam menyusuri negeri Pahang tu agak boring. Highwaynya elok, tapi baru di buka, R & R pun jauh jaraknya di antara satu sama lain. Kebanyakan pun nampak lengang saja. Bila masuk ke negeri Trengganu baru nampak cantik, especially bila dah nampak pantai, ombak laut dan kampung nelayan. Hubby pun dok nasihat anak-anak.

Hubby : "Anak-anak, nanti bila dah ada boyfriend, nak kawin, jangan cari orang jauh-jauh OK? "

Anak-anak : Sambil gelak. "Awat baba?"

Hubby : "Susah jauh-jauh macam ni. Tak larat kita nak pi".

Hubby : "Tanya dulu depa dari mana? Kalau jauh-jauh, macam Trengganu ka, kata reject, tak mau"

* Ada ke yang nak nangis ni?*

Anak -anak tambah kuat gelak.

Hubby : "Tengaok macam mama dengan baba, dekat tak susah. Nak beraya pun tak payah kelahi. Sebab tu baba dengan mama loving selalu"

Gelak sakan semua orang.

Aku : "Kalau Sabah (macam anak sedara baba?), Sarawak, orang overseas ka macam mana?"

Hubby : " Kalau Sabah atau Sarawak cancel tak mau OK? "

Kak Long : Sambil gelak "Nanti yang mana baba tak mau tu yang dapat kut"

Hubby : "Itu lah kan... (Looking at me) Macam anak Kak apa tu?"

Aku : "Kak Tam (my cousin) ?"

Hubby : " Haah Kak Tam, anak dia kawin dengan orang US pulak tu, dah kena duduk sana. Lagi haru no? "

Aku : "Kalau dah jodoh depa nak buat macam mana? "

Hubby : "Itulah, nak buat macam mana kena terima jugak lah".

* Ada yang senyum semula dah ke?*

Adik beradik yang lain yang naik bas Rombongan "Cik Kiah" sampai kemudian sedikit dari kami. Jadi berbahagi jugaklah, ada yang duduk di hotel, ada yang duduk di rumah yang di sewa oleh besan Abang Long yang kebetulannya tak jauh dari hotel kami. Alhamdulillah, di permudahkan segala urusan. Pada malamnya walau pun ada jemputan makan malam di rumah mentua Mamat, kami yang kat hotel tak pergi pun. Sebab kata Mamat cuma makan-makan, bukan ada adat berinai ke apa. Kami makan besebelahan dengan hotel saja. Aku suka tempat tu sebab banyak kemudahan, gerai makan banyak, tak berapa jauh dari bandar KT, tak lah terlalu sibuk macam dalam bandar besar. Pantai pun cantik. I like the place, kalau ke sana lagi, InsyaAllah maybe kami duduk sana lagi. Unless someone boleh rekomen somewhere better.

Walaupun diorang ni tempted tengok air laut, tapi kami tak benarkan anak-anak, dan anak-anak sedara mandi di pantai. Jadinya, diorang enjoy mandi kat swimming pool sajalah. Syia sampai nak sunburn jugaklah sebab lama kat dalam pool. Dapatlah dia lepas kan gian lama tak swimming tu.

Sabtu dah sibuk urusan pengantin. Akad nikah kat rumah pengantin perempuan pada pukul 11.00 pagi. Kami sampai elok-elok sebelum 11.00 pagi. Akad dijalankan sendiri oleh bapa pengantin perempuan. Pada aku, lapaz terima nikah tu sekali dah OK, tapi saja agaknya saksi-saksi tu minta sekali lagi. Pada aku nampaknya upacara akad nikah tu simple saja. Tak ada pun kena suruh baca surah2, ke apa apa ke. Sikit2 saja yang imam/kadhi tu bagi tahu pada pengantin pasal rukun2 nikah tu. Taklik pun pengantin lelaki yang baca. Tergagap jugak si Mamat ni baca sebab dalam tulisan jawi. Mungkin sebab sekarang dah ada kursus kawin agaknya. Semua dah di ajar dalam kursus tu.

Selesai bab akad nikah, sarung cincin bertukar hantaran dan bersanding sikit2, kami di jamu makan. Buffet style, simple saja jamuan pun compare dengan majlis kat sebelah Penang. Mungkin sebab kami orang Penang memang kaki makan jadi rasa simple saja tengok majlis kat Trengganu ni. Dah lama tunggu lepas makan, adik aku S dah mengelisah sebab tak tau apa nak buat duduk lama2 kat rumah orang. Dia pun plan-plan, ajak semua ke Pasar Payang. Nak shopping lah apa lagi. Abang Long dan isteri bersama nak beranak dia tinggal kat rumah kenduri sedangkan yang lain dah pergi shopping. Aku & famili ikut saja bas tu. Oleh kerana Monsson Cup belum habis, banyak jalan yang di tutup. Payah amat nak cari parking. Jam pulak tu di kebanyakkan jalan menuju ke Pasar Payang tu. Hubby dok mengelisah nak buang air kecik, so kami decide balik hotel saja. Abang Lang dengan anak2 dia ikut kami balik hotel. Yang perempuan2 (Dik Na, 3 tahun dan Kak Yah, 6 tahun- panggilan diorang ni), nak mandi kolam. Jadi petang tu aku dan anak2 habiskan masa babysit budak2 kecik tu mandi kolam. Seronok lah mak diorang (SIL) bershopping tanpa anak kecil2 tu.

Ahad pagi masa breakfast Po telefon. Mula tu aku tolak undangan dia nak bawa pergi makan Nasi Dagang sebab dah breakfast. Tapi persuasion power En Po ni memang kuat. Dia datang ke hotel pukul 10.00 lebih. Masa tu semua adik beradik yang lain dah pun check out sebab diorang naik bas, diorang bertolak awal selepas di jamu oleh besan Abang Long.

Masa Po datang, hubby pada mulanya tak nak keluar jumpa dia. Bukan pasal hubby sombong atau jeles. Mata hubby sebelah kanan dah merah. Panas kut. Jadi sakit sampai ke kepala, sejak dari malam sebelum tu lagi dah jadi macam tu. Aku suruh dia cari Eyemo dia cuma dapat beli Optrex. Lepas breakfast dia makan panadol dan tidur sekejap. Aku dah risau sebab nanti takut aku kena drive sepanjang jalan ke KL. Penat sangat drive long distance sorang2. Sebab badan dah lama ni :-). Nasib baik masa aku dok explain kat Po, hubby sakit mata, hubby muncul. Dah berkenalan dan juga dah bagi buah pala jeruk pada Po, dia pun pujuk lah hubby ajak pergi makan nasi dagang kat Chendering tu. Nasib baik hubby termakan pujukan Po, sebab memang nasi dagang kat situ sedap. Cuma, sebabkan orang Penang makan kari yang tak manis, rasa sedikit janggal. But overall, memang sedap. Lain kali kalau kami ada rezeki ke sana lagi sure kami cari jugak. Terimakasih Po, it was really nice meeting you. When we told hubby's sister that I met Po through the net, she was really suprised (Baca : terkejut beruk dia hehehe). She didn't expect hubby to be that open minded benarkan isteri dia berkawan dengan lelaki di internet pulak tu. Itu aku nama kan TRUST!!!

Lepas balik makan nasi dagang kami pun check-out dan terus menuju ke Pasar Payang. Abang Lang tunggu kami kat sana. Dia asyik telefon aku berkali2 sebab tak nampak rupa kami dah berjam2 dia tunggu Kak Lang bershopping. Dah banyak duit habis agaknya tu hehehe sebab Kak Lang suri rumah sepenuh masa, shopping memang handal tu. Kami membeli belah tak lah banyak sikit2 je nak buat kenangan dari Trengganu saja tu. T-shirts untuk anak2 dan bibik, tudung untuk aku dan keropok2 untuk bawak balik. Hubby ada jugak beli baju batik sehelai.

Bertolak ke KL, lagi sekali menyinggah untuk solat dan makan, akhirnya kami sampai di rumah SIL Kak Maz pada tengah malam. Semalam, Isnin kami berangkat balik dari Cyberjaya lepas melawat anak aku Kak Long pun dah lewat petang. Sampai rumah dah pun tengah malam. Maka berakhirlah kisah kami jalang-jalang ke Ganu dan balik.

Ada rezeki InsyaAllah kami akan sampai lagi. Tak serik lagi kami ni nak berjalan ni.

December 01, 2005

Jom Gi Ganu (Betul ke tu?)

Hari ni (Khamis) aku nak mulakan perjalanan ke Trengganu. Mula kami akan ke Cyberjaya dulu ambik Kak Long. Stay overnite kat rumah SIL Kak Maz dan jumaat pagi baru nak convoy dengan Abang Lang ke Kuala Trengganu. Mula tu plan nak ambik Angah sekali kat Seremban tu, tapi dia call tadi kata dia dah nak balik esok, dan kemudian dia ada games kat Bukit Jalil dan nanti dia balik ada training lagi. Akan cross path lagi aku dengan Angah. Tapi tak apa sebab adalah hikmah di sebalik itu. Angah boleh temankan maktok dan bibik semasa kami di Trengganu.

Banyak sungguh komen dan petunjuk tentang tempat makan, tak ketinggalan well wishes untuk berhati-hati dalam perjalanan aku ni. Terimakasih yang tak terhingga. Tak tahu lah aku samada dalam masa yang begitu singkat, aku dapat memenuhi semua cadangan2 itu ke tidak. Namun aku akan cuba untuk enjoy the trip, stay safe dan makan sebanyak mungkin makanan Trengganu :-), :-)

Kepada pengunjung yang begitu prihatin, terimakasih aku ucapkan, dan aku akan hanya dapat update blog ni minggu depan. Jadi jika ada yang datang tanpa apa-apa update, please be patient. Terimakasih atas kunjungan anda.