May 10, 2006

The "Mother" In Me

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Last night, Syia wished me Happy Mother's day and gave me a kiss on both cheek. I didn't expect her to remember but she did. Maybe it was the advertisement on the TV that reminded her. Whatever, I was touched by the gesture

Motherhood or to be more specific parenthood to me is not something that I learnt from school or text books or in MBA courses. Of course there are books, magazines and articles on parenthood, but every child is unique and experiencing the motherhood is something that every woman wants to treasure. The trials and tribulation of one mother is different from the other. Some are smooth sailing, everything seems perfect, but some are not. Only Allah knows who fit to be tried harder than the others.

Before I have children of my own, I was one of those who couldn't really be bothered with kids. Some ladies just love kids so much that they would be willing to take care and be a mother to other people's children. I wasn't really like that. I can hold babies, but if the baby wasn't mine, I wouldn't want to take care of him/her. I have this kind of attitude, he/she is yours so don't bother me with it.

I have been known to my daughter's friends as a fierce mom. They dared not come to my house because they were scared of me. Even if I brought my nieces, nephews and daughters (when they were younger) to the supermarket, I would be warning them that whoever got themselves lost (running around within the supermarket aisles) I would not be searching for them. They have to find their way home by themselves!!. Of course, I didn't mean it but it was enough to get the message across to them to behave and to be within the earshot.

I am not a perfect mother, but my daughters are so far Alhamdullilah are good daughters. They were not difficult to raise and they are not difficult adolescents (sp?). I tried my best and still trying to educate them to be a useful person, berakhlak and solehah. I am still trying and learning from the environment surrounding us. Time is different now, not like when I was a kid myself. I find myself, just cannot simply be a mother to my daughters, I have to be their friend too. I have to appreciate things that they like and be tolerant to certain things that they do. Of course, there shouldn't be total freedom to them. They know why they are not given the total freedom to do things they want to do. Alhamdulillah so far so good. I enjoy their company and they don't feel uneasy in my company.

Having said all that, I cannot tolerate the incidences of babies being abandoned by their mothers. Just because they were born out of wedlock. I can't bear the thoughts of innocent babies being dumped into the dustbins, or rubbish dumps or even a deserted stalls. This is clearly the case of "malu tak bertempat" Have they no shame (malu) to Allah when you committed the zina?. But when they carry the baby full term, after it was born they have the heart to abandon it. Why? Because you are shameful (malu) to raise an anak luar nikah. Please!!!!. Who are they feeling "malu" to? Did they ever thought of the soceity's scorn on their behaviour when they succumbed themselves to the sexual pleasures? Why then feel ashame of the consequences, right? What would they feel if their mothers had abandoned them long time ago? Just think forward. At least have some decency and respect to the young lives. They are innocent lives (although the soceity can be very cruel to them when they grow up). At least go to the center for unwed mothers and give your child there for adoption. I am not condoning the wrong act. Nauzubillah!!! Of course prevention is better than cure, but, we should also be a cure or a solution when there is a problem.

Anyway, to all the mothers out there,

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY

29 comments:

Eddie said...

Mothers Are Special. I'd just want to say that a mother is/ *can be the most influential force in a person's life.

Happy Mother's day Kak N.

Nora said...

Seronok baca blog Kak N..
SAya ni dah 39 minggu dah Kak N..baby tak keluag2 lagi..gamaknya nak tunggu bagi 40 minggu kot baru dia nak lihat dunia..termengah2 dah ni. Slagi larat..dok mai opis lagi ni. Pas ni lega...cuti 2 bulan. Happy mother's day untuk semua ibu2 yg dok baca blog..

Ordinary Superhero said...

Happy Mother's Day to you AuntyN.

AuntyN said...

eddie : Thank you

nora : Selamat Menjadi Ibu. All the best!!. First one ka ni?

OS : Thank you

~ahni~ said...

auntyN,
orang bela kucingpun bila kucing tu mati, orang tanam. macam mana pulak tang baby hidup dibuang macam tu sahaja? itu kategori lagi rendah dari binatang.

lifecuppa said...

selamat hari ibu auntyN!

AuntyN said...

ahni : *sigh*

onde : same to you.

anedra said...

happy mother's day aunty N!!

- said...

eh i tot mother's day is on the 14th of may..by the way, happy mother's day!!

UglyButAdorable said...

auntyN..happy mother's day. Such wonderful daughters you have.. Sometimes along the way in my life i've somehow dissapointed my mom indirectly..she would not thot that i've done something so bad.. but I never blame her. she has given me the best possible education and unconditional love. it's just me..

mayelly1 said...

alhamdulillah u have such beautiful and good kids. nothing more of what a mother could ask for.

selamat hari ibu...AuntyN cayang!

Ely said...

oops thats me auntyN hehehe

AuntyN said...

Dena : Happy Mother's day to you too. You are a wonderful mother yourself.

- : whoever you are. It is on 14th May. Syia has mistaken the date but it doen't matter isn't it? Thanks for the wish. (I don't know whether you are a mother or not to return the compliment)

UBA : If you still a mother which I think you do, please try to make ammend. Sometimes we feel that we have dissapointed our mother, nevertheless every mother in general would want the best for their children.

ely : Cayang Ely jugak no...Take care of the baby and yourself. Enjoy the pregnancy OK. :-)

Anonymous said...

AN....Happy Mother's Day to you too - Cucuninda

tee said...

happy mother's day to all moms out there...

AuntyN said...

CN and tee : same to you ladies.

Nazrah said...

haah bagi panic pulak, this sunday kan mother's day?

AuntyN said...

nazrah : Ye lah, 14hb Mother's day. Ni entry awai sebab malas nak update sampai next week.

JoKontan said...

To AN and to ALL Mothers out there.

Happy Mothers' Day.

sya said...

Kak N.. Happy Mothers day and "hugs"

maR said...

mami,
Selamat Hari Ibu *hugs*

AuntyN said...

TJ : Happy Mothers day to Maam. Thanks

Sya & Mar : Same to you ladies too. *hugs back*

Anonymous said...

Assalamualaikum..

Happy Mothers Day to My Lovely Mama.

wahhhh...awalnya sya wish.
bagus2...
:-)

Take Care.

Wassalam.

Idham said...

HAPPY MOTHERS' DAY! AUNTIE N

idham

Kak Teh said...

selamat hari ibu N!

anggerik merah said...

Wish you Happy mother's day AuntyN...

Nong said...

Dear N,
Happy Mother's Day... and for the lasting love that binds the family..

AuntyN said...

Kak Long : Thank you sayang. Mama loves you too.

Id :: Thank you. Please wish LIL for me.

Kak Teh : sama-sama Selamat Hari Ibu untuk Kak Teh jugak. Get well soon.

anggerik : Same to you my dear.

Nong : So very true. Happy Mother's day to you too.

To all who have wished me thru the blog and smses, THANK YOU so much.

Anonymous said...

Best regards from NY! » » »